If you’ve ever seen a faint second line appear, and then watched hope bleed away, you know how disorienting a chemical pregnancy can be. It’s often invisible to the outside world and minimized by language like “just a late period,” yet your heart knows the truth: life began, and now you’re grieving that life.

I’ve walked this road. After a 15-week miscarriage that shattered me, I conceived again quickly…and then again. The second time, I knew I was pregnant before the test confirmed it. My jeans fit differently, my body felt different, hope flickered. When I finally took the test, the line was there – faint, but real. Then the bleeding started. Sitting in the car with my husband, I answered the phone. Our doctor gently named what was happening: “It’s a chemical pregnancy.” I held it together until the call ended. Then I broke.

Loss is loss, whether it’s two weeks, fifteen weeks, or later. If this is your story, I’m so sorry, sister. You’re not alone, and your grief is not small. If you would like to hear my story, listen to this podcast episode here.

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What Is a Chemical Pregnancy?

A chemical pregnancy is an early miscarriage, typically occurring soon after conception. The egg and sperm meet. The spark of life truly happens, but the embryo struggles to implant into the uterine lining. Sometimes you see a faint positive test before bleeding begins; sometimes you only notice a “late period.” Without cycle charting, it’s easy to miss what really happened. Even when it’s early, your body has already begun to respond. Your heart has, too. The loss isn’t simply biological. It’s relational and spiritual. You were already imagining a future, even if it lasted only days.

In my course, Fertility Framework, I walk you through how to chart your cycles so that you can know when you are pregnant or if you have miscarried and then take you the step further – what you can do about it.

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We Have This Hope

Romans 5:1–11 tells us something that feels upside-down when you’re grieving:

“…we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.” (vv. 3–4)

That line “suffering produces .. hope” doesn’t make grief smaller; it gives grief a purpose God will not waste. Without suffering, there is no need for perseverance. Without perseverance, there is no refining of character. And without that refining, the hope we hold would be flimsy and easily shaken.

If we only ever lived in ease, our spiritual muscles would atrophy. But Jesus Himself chose suffering for our good. While we were powerless and still sinners, He died for us (vv. 6–8). Our hope exists because He suffered, not because He avoided pain. You are not defective for hurting; you are being shaped to look more like your Savior. Hope isn’t pretending everything is fine. Hope is anchoring yourself to the character of God when nothing feels fine.

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3 Steps To Guide You Into Healing

I want to share with you some ideas that can help you walk into healing after a chemical pregnancy.

1) Process The Loss

Grief is not your enemy; isolation is. Give yourself permission to feel. There isn’t one “right” way to grieve, and husbands often process differently. Talk together about what you each need. Some ideas that help many women can include:

• Name and honor your baby. Choose a name, write a letter, plant a flower, or keep a small keepsake. These tangible acts validate the life you carried and the love you still hold.
• Choose a verse to cling to. Ask the Holy Spirit to highlight one. Write it on a card, tape it to your mirror, say it out loud when the ache rises. (I’ll share one below.)
• Journal with God. Pour out the unfiltered version—tears, anger, confusion, hope. He already knows. Honesty becomes the doorway to comfort.
• Let someone in. Share your story in a safe place—your spouse, a trusted friend, or a Christ-centered community where women “get it.” If you want a gentle space, our Facebook group is open to you.

Grief doesn’t need fixing; it needs witnessing. As you honor this life, you also honor the God who knit that life in your womb.

2) Seek God’s Green Light

The desire to “try again right away” is normal. For some, the Lord gives a clear green light. For many, wisdom looks like waiting and actively healing.

From a body perspective, waiting 2-3 cycles often helps hormones recalibrate and your uterine lining restore. If you’re addressing deeper imbalances (inflammation, gut or liver stress, blood sugar instability, post-birth-control effects, thyroid concerns), your body typically heals in 3-6 month increments once you start making targeted changes. (Join us inside Fertility Framework to dive deep into understanding your hormones and the crucial role that they play). That doesn’t mean you’re “on hold” from life. It means you’re partnering with God’s design rather than sprinting on empty.

From a heart perspective, waiting creates room to mourn, receive comfort, and let God speak. He alone is sovereign over conception; we are responsible to listen and obey. Pray with your husband. Ask the Lord for unity and clarity. If He says “wait,” that’s not punishment. It’s protection and preparation.

3) Care for Your Temple

Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. If a storm damaged the Old Testament temple, the people didn’t sit on their hands; they got to work repairing it. In the same way, while you wait, you can actively support your body to welcome life again. Simple, strategic steps to help you nourish, stabilize and reduce inflammation can include:

• Protein at every meal (aim 25–35g): eggs, poultry, fish, beef, Greek yogurt, cottage cheese, legumes paired with rice/quinoa.
• Healthy fats to build hormones: olive oil, avocado, nuts/seeds, pasture-raised butter/ghee, fatty fish.
• Carbohydrates with fiber to steady blood sugar: sweet potatoes, oats, berries, beans, lentils, brown rice.
• Hydrate on purpose: add a pinch of mineral salt or an electrolyte powder (no artificial dyes) to one bottle daily.
• Crowd out ultra-processed foods with whole foods.
• Audit seed oils and excess sugar: swap for olive oil/avocado oil and fruit/honey in reasonable portions.
• Rotate potential gut irritants and track symptoms: bloating, skin changes, stool changes, energy dips.

The point isn’t perfection. It’s stewardship. You are not trying to “earn” a baby; you’re aligning your body with the way God designed it to flourish. If you are thinking that your hormones may be the issue behind some of the fertility problems you are facing, I’d encourage you to take my free hormone quiz to help you assess.

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What to Do With The Fear

Fear after loss is honest. But fear doesn’t get the final word. When the “what if it happens again?” thought arrives, meet it with truth: God’s character has not changed. Your body is not your enemy; it’s your ally in need of care. You are allowed to set a gentle pace. You’re building something you cannot yet see – perseverance, character, and hope.

Open your hands and ask the Lord to teach you how to wait with Him, not just wait for a result. Join our Facebook Group to hear testimonies from other women who are going through similar things, or who have already come out the other side and are cheering you on. We don’t have to walk this journey alone.

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